March 2011

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5. Twitter Marketers: There's nothing wrong with using twitter as part of your comprehensive social media/marketing strategy, but for heaven's sake, try to offer something more to your followers than a sales pitch, m'kay?

Tweeting "STREAM SATELLITE TV FOR EVER FOR JUST $600 A MONTH!!! 24 times a day isn't just a lame marketing strategy, it's as irritating as that obnoxious Aussie who yells about "DOLLARS FOR GOLD", on TV.

4. DM'ing: In the twitterverse, DM stands for Direct Message, not direct mail. DM's are a more private way of communicating with your twitter followers, yes, but nobody wants to have your annoying (and yes, lame) sales pitches DM'd to them right out of the gate.

3. DM'ing [part deux]: Also, I don't want you to DM me, ordering me to become your facebook fan! If I want to find you on facebook, I'll look for you.

2. Speaking of ordering me to do things: Sending me tweets asking me to RT your sales-pitch tweet is so aggravating it should be punishable by law, not to mention a HIGHLY ineffective marketing strategy. I'll decide when/if something is worth RT'ing to my followers, geddit?

1. Celeb wannabes: If you're hoping that I won't notice that you've unfollowed me, the minute I follow you back, you're s-o-l, pal.

Guess what? I didn't join twitter to be your fan and you ain't no celebrity. There are at least a thousand genuine nonreciprocating celebs I'd follow befor...Hell, I'd follow Charlie Sheen before I'd follow your sorry, unfollowing twitass, so get over your bad self and cease and desist with this most heinous of Twitcrimes, foo'!

Over'n'out...for now...

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Fresh off their Bieber hate-athon, grown-ups are now gunning for 13 yr old Rebecca (Fry-day) Black because she sings a crappy little song on youtube, that her mom paid $2000 for her to record. (I WISH my mom had been the type to shell out 2k for me to record a song when I was 13!).

Crappiness notwithstanding, when did adults become such schoolyard bullies? I mean really - picking on little kids for having fun?

You may say that Justin Bieber is a fair target because he's put himself out there intentionally, and is competing in an adult world, and blah deblah blah, but I don't remember adults sitting around, moaning about Donny Osmond, or Michael Jackson when I was a kid. Some smiled indulgently and a few said "kid has a nice voice", and a few others said "kid's singing about love, like he even knows what it is" but that's all I ever remember hearing from grown-ups, about my generation's pop-stars. So when did MY generation turn into such whiny, immature little bitches?

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